When it comes to things like confidence, peace of mind and wellbeing, it seems that a majority of people assume that they are things outside of us that we have to work to get.
But I’m here to tell you that confidence is actually something that is your default nature.
It is a part of you that you’ve always had, you’ve only been looking in the wrong direction to connect to it.
I know it may not look that way but let me break this down and give you a different way of looking at it.
Let’s start with what causes the doubt, uncertainty and lack of confidence.
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Uncertainty and lack of confidence comes from our innocent misunderstanding of the nature of thought.
A majority of us always focus on changing our behaviour or thoughts to create change in our lives.
But the problem with this is that whatever change you get will always seem hard.
Like you have to walk a thousand miles in the desert just to get to the beach.
It requires willpower and motivation which is why most people fail at it in the long term.
Because most of us haven’t trained our willpower or motivation to last the distance.
It is also part of the reason why we love to give ourselves labels and categories.
We have labels for why we may or may not be able to thrive in certain parts of our lives.
So you’ll hear labels like “sensitive” or “introvert” as a way to explain why we respond to situations in certain ways.
And then we’ll proceed to find ways of coping with life as we see it because of these labels
But here’s the thing:
Your behaviour and thoughts are just a tiny bit of WHO you are.
They are the temporary, variable and changeable part of WHO you are.
But most of us are so fixated on these tiny and variable parts.
We believe that they are sum total of WHO we are and if we can control and change them then everything else in our lives will fall into place.
But real change is what is actually underneath all that noise.
It is where your default and true nature resides.
And this true nature is innate well-being and peace.
Most importantly, it doesn’t require you to do anything to get it.
Your true nature is made up of all those things that you yearn for deep down and naturally gravitate towards - no matter what.
Confidence, happiness, wellbeing and wisdom.
You were born with this core nature.
It is not something you have to chase or get, it is something that is already a part of you.
The reason why it never seems that way is because a majority of us are always caught up in our temporary thinking of situations that we face.
We take the temporary thoughts passing through us seriously.
And we believe they mean something about us because they’ve floated through our minds.
We own them and carry them around like lost and excess baggage.
But when you know what makes us human and how we create our experiences,
…You’ll begin to see that you are not your behaviour or your thoughts.
You are what is underneath that and confidence is an unchangeable part of that.
If you want a basic and easy proof of this, pay attention to young kids.
They have no fear of anything.
They’re curious and see things and life with wonder most of the time.
And they also allow themselves to feel emotion without becoming those emotions.
They only learn to start putting labels on things and on themselves as they grow older.
So if kids can do this, then it means that we are all born with this ability.
It is our core nature.
We only learn to move away from our core nature or look away from it as we grow older.
And as we look away, we learn to depend more on things that we see rather than the parts of ourselves that remain underneath the circus of our momentary thoughts and emotions.
So you want to be more confident?
Start first by understanding WHO you are and what your true nature is.
Understand how we create our experiences as human beings.
When you can see that your core nature is what is underneath the circus of momentary thoughts passing through you,
And when you can also see that you can feel things without becoming them or doing anything about them,
…Your natural confidence in any situation will shine through – without any effort from you.
Because that’s how the system works.
It’s always about seeing different to show up different.
Feeling temporary doubt about things is not the problem.
Becoming that emotion and thinking you have to do something about it is where the problem is.
No one ever said that you wouldn’t feel doubt about things.
That’s not the problem.
In fact, it is a natural part of the process of life taking form within you.
The problem comes when you think it means something about you. And that you have to do something about it before you can “feel” confident.
There is nothing you have to do about a temporary thought and feeling except to recognise that they are temporary.
They will pass if you let them.
And they don’t need any help from you to pass through you.
You are already confident.
It is who you are and is unchangeable.
Connecting to it requires you to simply look underneath the noise of what is temporary to what you know is stable and unchangeable – always.
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