When it comes to your inner self or true self, most people start with the assumption that you have to “find it”
And that is usually where the problem begins.
Because the truth is:
It was never really lost. You’ve only been looking in a different direction for answers.
I’m going to show you a much simpler way of seeing and revealing your true self confidently.
And the reason why you’ll want to do this is:
So you can connect fully to all that you are whilst moving away from the expectations and beliefs of others.
Doing this is what opens up the path of passion and purpose in your life that lights you up.
Let’s get started.
Blog post after the jump
I wasn’t sure how to start this conversation about how to return to your true self.
But as I was writing in my journal it came to me that maybe it doesn’t have to be about anything but the “feeling”
Because the truth as I see it, and have been seeing it is that when it comes to your inner self and how to return to your true self…
…It’s always about the feeling.
The one question I keep getting when people come into my sphere and start learning more about what makes us human and how we create our experience is:
“how do I connect to that space within?”
“and how do I get back to that default space underneath all the noise of my thinking?”
In the past, I would tell people that there is nothing you MUST do to connect with your true self because you’re already connected it.
And whilst that’s true, I think we could probably go further to say that:
“it’s all about staying with the feeling of it”
If we could all just learn to stay with the feeling of it…
…A lot of unnecessary suffering can be avoided and a lot of heart’s desires can be created with ease.
Well, the best way I like to describe the “feeling” of your inner self is to imagine those first 2-3 minutes when you just wake up from sleep.
There is a certain “settled feeling” that we all have.
This feeling lasts just for a few minutes before our minds try to be “helpful” by reminding us of all the things we were thinking and worrying about before we dropped off to sleep.
If you can allow yourself to stay with that “settled feeling” …
And Just gently hold on it whilst you “notice” your mind bringing up topics for thought…
…you will begin to see something different
Whether it’s the stagnant feeling of thinking your life is on hold…
…. or feeling trapped in your day to day life without any control over the day to day trajectory of your path.
Staying with that “settled feeling” of your inner self is what brings on the clarity.
And clarity is what opens the door to those paths of least resistance that have been available to you all along.
It is what opens the door to the insights of WHO we are and what is possible.
Here’s another way to look at it…
Byron Katie, the spiritual teacher has an exercise that she calls “the work”
And the essence of the work is to help people challenge their stories and beliefs of WHO they think they are.
So you would start with a thought that you believed was true like:
“I am _______”
” My boss Katia is _______”
Then you would ask 4 questions that challenged the absolute nature of that thought and pushed against the walls of beliefs that you’ve built around those thoughts.
And in the end, you ask yourself:
“who would I be without this thought or story?”
Then the process of the work goes on to turn things around.
One important thing that comes up from this process is not just the liberation of not being tied to a particular story about yourself…
…But more importantly, seeing that you are more than the thoughts.
They aren’t as important as you may have previously believed.
But here’s an even more important question that should follow from this process…
If you aren’t your thoughts, then what are you?
WHO are you?
There are so many words that we can use to describe WHO we are but the feeling of our inner self is one that NEVER changes
Sometimes we get stuck with trying to find words and put things into boxes but I’m encouraging you to move BEYOND the words.
The words represent the thoughts that are most often a distraction.
But the feeling of true self is one that all of us have a sense of.
It never goes away and it never changes.
We all experience it.
This is why spiritual teachers Abraham Hicks always jokingly say the best way to reset yourself is to go to sleep.
Because those first few minutes when you’re awake and there is no agenda… is WHO you are.
You are at your default state at that moment.
Your job during the day is simply to do whatever you need to do to stay with the feeling of it..
You’ll find that your journey of staying with that feeling of your inner self is what helps you naturally let go of unnecessary thoughts and actions that take you away from it.
And you’ll also find that you challenge a lot of things that you probably tolerated in the past
Most importantly you’ll notice the momentum and change you’ve been craving whilst at the same time, staying grounded and at peace
Your ego or self-image is the one thing hinders your re-invention. It’s not what you think you already know or what you believe others will think of you… it’s always about what you ALLOW yourself to see.
Your inner self is not something you have to find…you are already connected to it. Your passion and purpose come when you discover how to reveal it confidently.
But how do you get there… to that space within so that you can live the life you are destined to live and be the person you’re meant to be? ….The answer is a lot closer than you think.
I’m Elizabeth Archibong. A Nigerian girl obsessed setting the rules on fire to create life and results from a place of ease and a path of least resistance. I teach people how to see themselves more simply and accurately. So that they can create and get more of the things that they want.
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One Response
I love what you said about finding my true self using the “feeling of it”. I had a session with a coach a few years ago, and the whole session was built on her asking questions, taking detailed notes, and then repeating back what I said. Many of her questions were about when I *felt* a certain way. Much of our discussion was around huge changes I made that I felt GREAT about. Then she would dig into why there was energy around it and how it motivated me. It was very productive. Great post, thanks!